Ultimate Massage

I love massages, most of the time I would rather give a massage than get one. (And no, hot-stone-massageI don’t turn everyone of them into an excuse for sex, although if that is how she wishes to tip me, who am I to argue.)  Following is what I would consider to be the ultimate massage.  I think almost every guy would enjoy it.

Let’s face it, most of the time when a guy gets a massage, he really gets in the mood to have sex.  After all the rubbing and stroking of his body get him excited and part of his brain is thinking, “I wonder if I will get a happy ending or not.”  Another part of him may be embarrassed that the signs of his arousal are so obvious and maybe a little worried if it is making his wife uncomfortable.  Sometimes we think, “She agreed to the massage, she did not agree to making love afterward and I want both.”  The problem with all of this is, this has the effect of distracting the man from the pleasure of the massage because he is wondering if he is going to get his happy ending.  (I know we should not be like this, but I am just being honest.)

So Here is My Solution: Start the massage with a happy beginning(Yep, that means what you think it means.) Start with him laying on his back and use whatever method you know he would like and allow him to orgasm at the start. (I would suggest something other than intercourse though – more on that later.) Allow him to get that release out of the way, that way he is not thinking about if it will happen, but rather enjoying the effects of just having orgasmed.

FUENTE_Hot_Stone_Massage_314From there, clean him up as needed, have him roll over and start giving him a regular massage. (If want to learn to give a better massage, youtube.com has several good tutorials) He will be relaxed because of his happy beginning and will probably be putty in your hands. Do a good job on him, spending a decent amount of time. (When I massage my wife, I try to spend about a half an hour working on her back and the same on her stomach – that is before I would start doing anything that would constitute an erotic massage, if she is up for it that night.)  Depending on many things, there is a good chance that he will fall asleep while you are working on him.

Turn him over and start on his front side. I suggest starting with the face, massaging the muscles there (a lot of tension starts in the face, the eyes and the jaw), then working down the torso, stop at the waist, go to the feet (as a runner, I really appreciate a good foot message) and work your way up.  Again, take your time, enjoy what you are doing, when you are enjoying it, it will be more enjoyable for him.  Give the hips and both inner and outer thighs a lot of attention.  Now when you get back to his crotch, give hit a nice rub, all over, that too can be very relaxing and enjoyable.

There are a couple of options here that can happen, in reality both are wonderful. If your man is plain wore out, there is a very good chance that he will just fall asleep.  If he does, let him sleep, it is likely that he will have about the best sleep he has had in a long time.  His muscles relaxed by your hands after you had relaxed another part of his body.  If this is the way the massage finishes, give yourself a pat on the back, say to yourself, “I done good!” and lay down next to him and fall asleep in the knowledge that you did a good job.  (You will probably wake to having the most grateful man in the world kissing your feet and offering to fix you breakfast or whatever you want.)  The other option is also nice for both of you also.  If, while you are massaging around his crotch, something comes up and announces to you that it is ready for more attention, take your time, with your message, encourage it, play with it however you want and when you are ready, climb on top of your husband and make love to him. (That is why I did not recommend his first orgasm to be achieved through intercourse, but you certainly would know what would be best for your man, not me.) Match your moods to each other, knowing that since he has already had one orgasm that night it will probably take a bit for the second one to happen.  When all of this happens, I can almost guarantee you that you will have the happiest man in the world in  bed with you.  He will probably be wondering whatever did he do to get so lucky and to deserve such a wonderful wife.

One word of caution, when he has that second orgasm, after all you have done to massage him after the first orgasm, he is probably going to be like jelly and will sleep so soundly that nothing will wake him that night.  Don’t expect a long cuddling afterglow after this night, but know that you have given him a gift beyond any price.

I can virtually guarantee that you will put a smile on his face that will last for days.  I wonder if I can talk Mrs. Jed into one of these tonight.  Sounds like a great idea to me.

A Couple Things to Consider:

Make sure the room temperature is pleasant.  You don’t want him shivering from the cold or sweating from the heat.
Use oil for the massage. Although you can buy massage oils, they can be pricey.  We have used both olive oil and coconut oil.  Both are easily found and both seem to be save to use a lubricant for intercourse.  Baby oil may not be a good choice, in my research there was some indications it might not be good to use for intercourse.
Make sure the oil is warmed up to about 100 degrees, either too hot or too cold is not fun.
– Set the mood with his favorite music, soft lighting, candles, whatever you think would make a nice setting for you both.
– Another thing, the less you wear the better. For one you don’t want to get oil on something and ruin it. Another thing, let’s face it, he will love feeling your bare skin against his during the massage and he gets to see your body, something he probably never gets enough of.  Also, it makes it that much easier for you to crawl on top of him at the end if you don’t have to take anything off.

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8 thoughts on “Ultimate Massage

  1. “The problem with all of this is, this has the effect of distracting the man from the pleasure of the massage because he is wondering if he is going to get his happy ending. (I know we should not be like this, but I am just being honest.)” He is being very true about this ladies. We are like a beagle that is ruled by its stomach. We enjoy the kind words and all the petting, but we are in a constant state of distraction by the treat we know you are holding out on us.

    I had never thought about it, but beginning with the happy ending makes sense. It would be the same as cuddling is for women after sex. I think that’s a great idea. One thing thought ladies. You aren’t doing it first and rushing through it to get it out of the way so you can get to the massage. Take your time with it. Think of it this way. The manipulation and orgasm is “foreplay” to the “sex” of the massage. I think that would be an accurate balance for most men.

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