Other Ways to Show Love

Most of us have thought about different ways to express love to the ones that we love.  I want to share a few ideas about ways to make your husband feel loved.

Show him respect to your husband and teach your children to respect him also.  I Respectthink this is a huge one today.  We live in a world where there is so much disrespect.  Respect is something we crave, we don’t like it when people dismiss us, our opinions, or our actions as being worthless.  We all want people in general and our families specifically to give honest, careful consideration to our actions.  We don’t often get it in the world, but we crave it from our family. (PeacefulWife.com has a couple of posts that you may want to check out on this topic.5 Ways Wives Unwittingly Disrespect Their Husbands & Husbands Share What is Disrespectful to Them)

Tell him that he is special to you. Most guys are used to hearing “I love you,” from their wife.  It is common, expected, and sometimes said out of habit more than out of genuine feeling. (At the very least guys worry it is said out of habit whether it really is or not.) However, when a wife says, “You are really special to me,” it makes him feel awesome.  It makes him think, “Wow, she really does care, she really does like me and love me.” Want to take it up a notch? Tell him you crave him!  That will Rock His World!

Presents are always nice: It does not have to be big expensive ones, just something CLIF Builder's Cookies & Cream Bar Closethat shows you are thinking about him and want to do something nice for him.  When my wife buys me a couple of my favorite energy/protein bars (Cliff: Builder Bars) or drops a Slushi by my office, I love it.  It shows that she is thinking of me and who does not like to be thought of?

Time with him, doing something he likes: I don’t watch a lot of sports on TV, on an average weekend, I may see a half of a football game and that is normally comprised of watching a few minutes of games on Saturday, Sunday, and Monday.  The one denver-broncos-wallpaper__400x250exception is if we are getting the Denver Bronco game.  Then I will probably sit and watch the whole game, only moving to get another diet Dr. Pepper or some snacks.  The Broncos are a family event, the boys are even more into them than me.  My wife likes them, but normally has something else she would rather do than watch them with me.  I love it however, when she says, “Forget the other stuff.” and pulls out the blanket and cuddles up with me on the couch to watch the game.  It is a treat, even if she does fall asleep and I can’t cheer as loud for the touchdowns as I would if she was not there.  The same thing is true when she watches a movie that I like and she really does not care about or even a bigger sacrifice, she watches a Marathon with me.  It is one of the things that she does to show me that she cares about me and that she loves me.

Something written down that he can keep.  My wife bought a blank book a couple of years ago and about every month or so, she writes in it and then leaves it on my pillow.  It is so nice to see something written that I know I can read later on when I am feeling down.  She normally tells me two things, that she loves me and what she appreciates about me.  It is nice to feel appreciate!

If you are still not sure what to do – ASK HIM!  He would be thrilled to know that you are thinking of him enough that you want to do something to reward him.  If you ask him, don’t let him say, “You don’t need to do anything.”  Tell him, that you want to do something nice for him.  You plan to do it periodically and you want to know what he would like.  Just make sure if you ask him, you do something soon for him.  You don’t want to get his hopes up and then not do anything.

Some other things that are nice:

  • A Massage (You may want to read my post about The Ultimate Message)
  • His Favorite Dinner.
  • A date – just the two of you, ask him out, take care of everything.
  • Doing some of his chores.
  • Dinner or lunch at a place he likes.
  • Letting sleep in.
  • Taking him out for a treat: An ice cream date, a coffee date…

You are only limited by your imagination. Many of the things you can do are low cost or no cost.

 
 
 

A Little Humor

I found this a while back somewhere on the web.  I don’t know who wrote, but I found it pretty funny.  I hope it gives you a smile.  (Ladies, if it does not make you smile, I am sorry, pass it on to your husband, it would probably work on him.)

“I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.”

For Example: One evening last week, my wife and I were in bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says “I don’t feel like it, I just want you to hold me.”

I said “What??!! What was that?!”

So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to hear… “You’re justStop not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.” She responded to my puzzled look by saying, “Can’t you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?”

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several COASdifferent very expensive outfits. She couldn’t decide which one to take so I told her we’d just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said let’s get a pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you…she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn’t even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, “That’s fine, honey.” She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, “I think this is all dear, let’s go to the cashier.”

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, “No honey, I don’t feel like it.”

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled What?”

I then said “Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You’re just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.” And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, “Why can’t you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?”

Apparently I’m not having sex tonight either.

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I know you have probably read this one before, but I hope it made you smile none the less!

What Makes a Nice Night: It Might Surprise You!

park benchI have been thinking lately, “What is it that makes a great night with my wife?”  As I thought about it, I really had to wrestle with it, since we have had some many great nights together, I wanted to know what they had in common.

The more I thought about it, the easier it got.  The nights that I enjoy most are the nights that we connect.  Sometimes it is a date out, sometimes it is a date in, but either way, it is on those nights when we truly talk to one another and it is so sweet.  Sometimes the holdinghandstalk is about important things, but most of the time it is not all business, but rather enjoyable topics, hopes and dreams, stuff the kids did, memories of other times, and silly things.  Most of all it is expressions of love, some silly, some flirty, some cuddly, some romantic, and some passionate.

Does it always lead to making love? No, it happens some of the couple-talkingtime, but not all of it by any means.  It is about closeness, it is about connecting.  It is those nights more than any other that draw us close together.

Take that time for each other, it will help you grow closer and it will help you to keep both of your world’s rocked all the time!

Let Him Pamper You!

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I love to pamper my wife.  I like to do nice things for her, romantic events, flowers, gifts, 25-Red-roses-in-a-vase-300x300and such.  For our 25th anniversary, I surprised her with a romantic weekend get away.  25 roses where waiting for us in our hotel room, I wrote a memory book that I had published from a custom book company, and I pampered her as much as possible.  I loved every minute of it.

I could go on about other things, but I think you get the point that I like to do things for her.  Candle light, soft 06-pamper-woman-061211music, sparkling grape juice (We don’t drink) and whatever I can do to make her feel loved. I love to give her back rubs and full body rubs.  I love to use oil on her, I love the way it leaves her skin so soft for days, even weeks later.

However, there is a problem.  She is resistant to me doing these things.  She does not like me making a big deal over her.  I have made it clear to her that I don’t do these things so she will make love to me.  I told her many times, I would be happy if she would just fall asleep while I did it.

The truth is it really bugs me that she does not let me pamper her more.  Which, pamper 1  brings me to my point for you wives out there.  It is quite simple, when your husband wants to pamper you, LET HIM!  It will make him happy, he will enjoy it. Relax, let him take care of you, let him pamper you.  If he is asking to do it, then he wants to do it. Don’t feel guilty, feel cherished. The more you enjoy it, the more he will enjoy it. It is definitely a Win – Win situation!

Postscript: I just read a wonderful post today by Forgiven Wife, entitled: “Leap of Faith.”  Her post relates to the topic of this blog since she is dealing with wives who feel that they are not worthy of happiness in marriage.  I found this to be a great article and it may give you an insight about why some ladies don’t want to be to be pampered.